When to Intervene With Your Client’s Personal Life

QUESTION: I have a Client who has paid for or booked a Mentoring Session/ Reading with me. When we started they began to tell me about their current situation and it involved depression, self-harm, harm of others or other forms of direct abuse. What do I need to do, and how can I intervene and manage the session so that I am abiding by my ethics and maintaining the safety of my client?

Disclaimer: These are my options, and my approach as a Practioner of Tarot, Shadow Mentoring and Divination healing. I always like to set up a short introductory assessment for all my Mentoring clients to ensure they feel they are in the right mental and physical health and space to be able to fully engage in the sessions and or readings.

“I need your help.”

There is a number of ways you can take the request. In this post we are going to look at a scenario where a client has asked us to take part in a session that requires more assistance and support then we can offer, and how to go about determining whether the session can continue, how to handle the let down and where to go from there professionally.

It is no surprise that when it comes to determining whether your client wants your support or to be rescued it’s not always black and white, there are always going to be shades of grey and splashes of color in between. They gray areas may be fuzzy depending on the person, especially if they are a regular client or work in your close network tree.

You may feel the empathetic tug when someone comes to you seeking your guidance, and instead brings you into the victim stories. Often these are the clients that need more than the resources you can ethically offer. After all, when supporting someone on their path you want them to be empowered and for them to take responsibility for the part that they play in their own lives.

How do you do that when you are unsure whether they are seeking validation, clarification or supposition?

How can you feel into the real truth of what they are asking, needing, or their overall intent?

When do you know if their issues are heart centered or dangerous?

When do you cease being a Mentor or practioner, and become a confidant into something that is deeply personal and could harm your client or other people?

You want to support them, give them the guidance that they seek while maintaining your ethics, and business practice.

Your First call of action is to use your common sense. Go into your own body, center yourself, and then reach out into the energetic field of your client. You can do this verbally as well, calling upon the universe to ground you both, or you might even take your client into meditation while you work on processing their question and needs.

You want to make sure your own protective shield is active and supported, so that you can feel the energy of your client, but you do not draw low vibration or negative energy into yourself.

This is where you work through the question asked. If it was as vague as “I need your help”, ask for more clarity in the area they need help with, go deeper with the questions. This is a time to also draw on your strong foundations and healthy boundaries that comprise of your ethics, skills, resources and guidelines of practice.

Say your client comes to you and asks you one of these two things [This is an example]

“I need help with a banishing ritual to get rid of my Ex- Boyfriend/Girlfriend.”

Or

“I really need your guidance and help to get stop my Boyfriend from abusing me and others. What should I do?”

Both of these are serious requests, and look similar in the way they are both reliant on you giving them the validation, confirmation or power they need to step up to their own life path.

You might accept their request to aid them with a banishing spell because you have had experience with it yourself, and to do so would be in alignment with your ethics. Remembering you don’t want to just give them the answer. Mentoring, Shadow Work and Readings are always about pulling your client back into the driver’s seat, not giving them the answers to life’s overarching quizzes.

With the second request this is where you would need to take a breath, a few deep breaths, and question where you can intervene. You have stepped outside the lines of comfort, and if you choose to continue your service while remaining conscious of your clients issues you are about to abuse your position, and possibly compromise your clients mental and physical well being by offering a service that you are not qualified to assist with [unless of course you are trained as a professional in the mental health or authorities department.] You are participating in third party engagements by proxy. You know that this request is now something that cannot be ignored as it affects your client and others, and your client has made the decision for you to bring to the table private details about this third, or even fourth parties behavior.

You may have a multitude of ways you can respond, from experience, or by using advice you have heard or been given yourself in diverse situations revolving around abuse.

Your own opinions and desire to take away the suffering, or to enlighten them with suggestions on how to walk a healthy path will come to the surface. How could they not? We have all been there at some part in our lives, on our paths.

You could be five minutes into the reading or thirty, the time doesn’t matter. This is where I would call to attention that I cannot offer the support that they need, and either lead them towards support that I was educated and aware of that could, or refund their money and let them know that the avenue they are requesting guidance from is not suitable for their direct needs.

They paid me for a service and I cannot give it to them? What about the time that I invested in the reading?

The simple reality for me as a Mentor/Reader is that I do not feel obligated to accept their money if I have not been able to provide them with a stable service. Keeping in mind I am conscious of the client coming into the session, their strengths and weaknesses and the areas they want to work on. Make note that this is different to when a Client is not engaged or dissatisfied with a reading, and usually it does not get past the five or ten minute marker for me to have invested to much of my resources.

Be strong, say no. There is bound to be frustration and anger, or the client may feel duped or unsatisfied, the harshness of reality and also the blessing is that you are allowing them to have power over their situation.

What if I can see that a Client is injured or shows signs of fear of disassociation?

Accept that this is part and parcel with your healing work and it can happen.

Simply help to center them for a moment and then lead them into the direction of a number they can contact or service they can investigate. [It helps to have these on hand even as a Tarot reader]

The same can be said for self harm, depression, suicidal confessions or behavior, whatever the disconnection, or injury. It is paramount that you are clear of what your own boundaries are. When you are, you allow yourself the resources to actually give to your client.

Their work is a deeper seated than Shadow work [which should always be explored with full mental consciousness to the practice – Physically and mentally]

Be kind, compassionate and assertive. Remember that while it may frustrate you, you have the power to assist by not making their decisions for them. People living in fear often reach out to the most unlikely places due to desperation, or a need for a different avenue or perspective.

Supporting a Client is always a two sided experience. You want your client to be consciously participating alongside you, even if they only ask questions and comment on the resonance of your cards.

QUESTIONS TO CONSIDER